A falling star fell from your heart and landed in my eyes I screamed aloud, as it tore through them, and now it's left me blind

The other day while going through my daily blog addictions I came across a questionnaire that I found to be really interesting. It's called something like 3o questions of truth. As I was reading the questions I found myself answering each one in my head. I like how honest the questions were & how it forces you to be truthful about yourself & the things in your life. I can't tell you how much this parallels with my life right now. Something that I have learned lately is, talking about what you are going through or have been through with others & being open leads freedom.

"And he said unto them, Is a candle brought to be put under a bushel, or under a bed? And not to be set on a candlestick? For there is nothing hid which shall not be manifested; neither was anything kept secret, but that it should come abroad." Mark 4:21-22

So I have decided to take on this & make into a little project on here. Every Tuesday, for 30 weeks I'm going to post a question from the questionnaire & answering it the most honest way I can. I realize this means I'm going to have to be vulnerable like Woah, but it's all about the learning process & realizing things in my own life.

I'm still trying to think of a catchy name, but for now I'm going to call it 30 weeks of Vulnerability.

Feel free to answer the questions yourself when you comment! That would be amazing. It's all about sharing life experiences & struggles.

So next week will be the first question I will post & I'm so excited!!

Oh yes, I also was interviewed by the super cute Tuesdai for her blog "...a reflection by Tuesdai." Go check it out here!! I had so much fun doing this interview & I felt super special she asked me.

Title: Cosmic Love by Florence & the Machine

Well I have been searching all of my days All of my days Many a road, you know I've been walking on All of my days

This is what I feel like today.

This is what I wish I could do today.

So this is what my spirit & soul is listening to for the day.

Title: All Of My Days by Alexi Murdoch

It's so available to you right now just taste and see, it's a new season (it's a new season)

I have been reminded many times over the past couple of weeks of how things in my life are changing. Somethings are going up & somethings are drifting away. Winter has gone & spring has sprung & we are all making the transition into the sunny days of summer. I have the tendencies to go back in the past & remember how good those days were & reminiscing about my life back then. I suppose it is what we do as humans. It's sometimes hard to look forward & see the uncertainty of our future. My best friend, Lexie, reminded me last night when we were talking, that this is a new season for me & I need to embrace every single part of it. Whatever is in my past should be left there! It is in the past & does not effect my present. Thank you Jesus for best friends that have wisdom & give it to you straight. These lyrics to New Season by Israel & Newbreed has been one of my favorite songs for the past couple of years & I always play it early in the mornings when I wake up or as I'm about to get into bed. It's a promise that has been given to me. That this is a new season & I am on a new adventure. Everyday I wake up & it's a new day.

"It's a new season, it's a new day. Fresh anointing is flowing my way. It's a season of power & prosperity. It's a new season coming to me."

photos from weheartit

Title: New Season by Israel & Newbreed

The earth can never hold this love that burns my soul heaven holds me I can't hold my love back from you I've got to sing

Monday, bloody Monday...okay so I changed the words around a little (if you know what song I am referring to, you are now my favorite person.) I had a wonderful, crazy, upside down weekend. Babysitting alot, learning all the things I need to know about my second job ( yes, I got a second job!), being with family for my brother Beau's 43rd birthday, & helping my brother Cale & sister-in-law Ky move back to Dallas (highlight of my weekend!) And the week is going to just get crazier I know. My planner is filled every day with little things I have to get done ASAP. I can't remember the last time I was this busy, but I'm excited to get the ball rolling on things.

I had mentioned last week that I'm doing a detox the whole month of February & it's more a spiritual kind of detox. Without going into so many details (there are a lot), I basically need to spend more time with my Father God. That's what it boils down to. It's so easy to do, but yet I make it complicated. So I felt this month, this is the month that I'm finally putting my bloody foot down & saying it's time.

Last year I started listening to Sarah McMillan's music on her Myspace. She's the wife of John Mark McMillan, & they are both brilliant song writers. I lover her folk sound. It's very real & genuine & you know the words she is singing comes from the deep crevices of her heart & soul. I had forgotten how much her music & sound had affected me, til I tuned in again this past week. Shea & I can't stop listening to her. So I decided that Sarah's album, Under Your Bright Wings, will be my music album of this month on PassionBird. You can click on her album to the left < yes, yes, over there, that's it. I also love that she's an artist & a mom on top of being a musician. That's called a multi-tasker for sure.
Happy Music Monday loves! I'm happy it's a new day.

Title: Sing My Love by Sarah McMillan

Skeleton bones stand at the sound of eternity On the lips of the found And gravestones roll To the rhythm of the sound of you

So I’ll stand With arms high and heart abandoned In awe of the One who gave it all So I’ll stand My soul Lord to You surrendered All I am is Yours

Do you ever see something that completely makes you feel like what you are doing now, is not up to what you know you could be doing? Looking through my blogs the other day I stopped over at All Things Lovely , Kylie's wonderful inspirational blog. She had posted a video of a movie that is about to come out made by Hillsong United. I'm very familiar with Hillsong & I have loved their music since junior high, but they have never done anything like this film before. I'm so excited about it to come out & I know it will be something that has impact on a lot of people. One thing that on of the band members says in the video is, "You see these streets & people going about life. If what's happening in those four walls is having no effect on those streets we travel down to get there, then maybe we are missing the point." Kylie told me the film is coming out here in the state on November 4th she thinks, so be looking out for it. To see more of what this film & movement is all about, go here I-Heart Revolution.

O lord what can I say I am so sad since you went away time time ticking on me Alone is the last place I wanted to be Lord what can I say

Today has been so long & so full of every emotion known to man. Some things just don't always work out & you have to go through steps & rethink a way of doing something. You wonder all this time if you are actually are going to make it through this time, but through the whole process you are still very hesitant to say you have victory. I was angry today that's for sure & just fed up & frustrated. I took it out on my sister Shea (don't worry I already said I was very sorry for this.) & we didn't talk for a couple of hours, this is very hard when you live in a very small apartment together.
Some times I think I'm not going to make it through & all I want to say is forget you day & go to sleep. But today I stuck it out & I'm so glad I did because I would have missed out on the rainbow after the storm. All I can say is I thank my Papa God for putting women in my life that are amazing & take care of me when I lack in this area. And for my Mum, today, she was my Shero.
This is a little long & normally I don't like to write a lot but this time I'm going to. Today waiting in the financial aid office a guy came over & sat right next to me ( a little to close.) He immediately started up a conversation with me & asking me questions about financial aid he thought I might know. Well I had no clue what he was talking about, so after I wasn't answering his questions about that he changed the subject. He asked me about my tattoo on my wrist (refer to the header of my blog, yep that's my tattoo.) It's a very personal subject & it's hard for me to tell someone what it means to me without going deep into the meaning. But I went ahead after he continued to ask me the meaning & I told him. After this he asked me my major & things of this, but then he was called into the office so off he went.
When he left, I felt like I did not want to tell him what my tattoo meant! I kind of felt like I had given him a little piece of who I am, & i don't know him from Adam! The reason I got the tattoo on my wrist is because I do want to tell people the meaning, but it's hard for me to just open up to people that I don't know (blogging doesn't count.) Especially when someone is just trying to make conversation or just flirting with me. I feel like I need to come up with a much better explanation, that way I don't sound like some dumb kid that went to go get a tat of a bird cus I thought it was cute. I will work on this tomorrow!

"I give up trying to earn Your love,
I just look above, up to You.
My desire is to see Your fire,
Growing even higher than before.

God I love You and all You do,
Your joy lives inside and does me good,
Can I have more of You?
Amazing grace, how sweet the sound,
Oh, my God, You never let me down,
Can I have more of You?"

I have been hearing this song play in my head as i go to sleep every night for the past week.
I didn't even know all the lyrics, but I knew it is sung by Kim Walker. I found the song & i'm starting my morning off so good.