Where do i go from here now? I was so excited & ready t get out there & i feel like i just can't go. There are times in your life where you just think "why am i doing this again?" I mean i know why im going, because i haven't been in a long time & i need t be fed and fellowship with others, that's also what the bible tells us to do. And i feel like i have been hiding away for so long & this maybe was my chance t come out. I just want t be nourished by someone else for awhile, im really tired of doin this by myslef & looking to me for the "well wha the hell is your next step in this situation?"
I feel like after everything i experienced in 2008, i really need an all or nothing. Right now its giving me nothing going, but at the same time its not like im doin anything for myself i feel like. How can i ask someone t help me & get me through this if im doing nothing for myself i guess. This has been a constant battle this past year & i have ended up short every time. Im coming to the end of my rope with this whole thing, im craving t be in a community w people tht know wha they r talking about & arent just in it for the socializing. Thats just what it seems like. Im mentally exhausted. I guess there is hope for the hopeless & j.k. living, i have t remember that.